Pavlova!

Backlog.. so busy lately!

Been so busy with crew, classes and such. Seems like I have a pretty significant workload this year. But today was my first day after crew practice where I got to come home, since dropping 9am French C&C. I managed to whip up some chicken and asparagus, in the bacon I'm still trying to get rid of. Not the healthiest thing, but whatever, it's tasty. Lined everything with some cucumber and just some plain rice. Simple, quick. I didn't even manage to eat this until dinnertime cause I was so busy with class and stuff and crew physicals. Ate in the new Charles Commons dorm place thingy. They certainly have a problem with lines, but the place is nice. Very comfortable seating and it certainly doesn't look like a dining hall. I think I'll hang out there for more than just the food, do some studying there sometime over dinner.


This one was from a while back, on the 8th. Made some fried rice with egg, mixed frozen veggies and of course bacon again. Then sauted some green beans with bacon, and then took one of my frozen scallion pancakes and heated it up and cut it up. Fast and easy. Sounds like the theme of my unfortunate eating habits lately...

Fishies!

This is my new bento box! It's way cute. and the little chick at the bottom holds rice seasoning. But anyway, my bento for today was just some rice, some tortellini with alfredo sauce, bell peppers, and italian sausage, then for some more vegetables, I took a little bit of bacon in a pan and kinda stirfried that up with some frozen mixed veggies. I know, it's all way fat, but it was super good. Here's the pic:

MY FIRST BENTO!!!

Ohmygosh, my bento box came in today! It has fishies and says "Happy Together"... I'll take a pic of the cover later. This was my bento for today, I only had like 45 minutes to make it because I was in a rush to get to the DMC to work on crew dvd stuff. But made some sushi rice, sprinkled with nori furikake, stir-fried some chicken, asparagus, onions and garlic with some dark soy and a tiny bit of corn starch to make it thick. I also tried out my new egg molder, so I have half a hard-boiled egg there between the cucumber slices, in the shape of a teddy bear! Apparently JUMBO eggs are too big to fit in the mold, so next time I buy eggs I'll downgrade to large so I don't do a lot of nasty squishy squishy to the side of the eggs.

On another note, I'm glad orientation is finally over with. So over being an SA and stuff, now I gotta concentrate on school, GRE's (i mean, start), and of course crew. And crew's already starting to be a bit of a bore. Maybe it's just cause we're not on the water yet and doing all the usual pre-crew buildup crap.

Who knows... I don't need any more drama right now. Save it for later. Or I'll break down. I'm already sick, at least it's not strep like J had... I was really worried the reason why I wasn't getting better was because it was bacterial, in which case I would need to take antibiotics, which would really make my system shot. I can't mess it up anymore right now, my goal is to eat healthy and smaller portions, go to the gym more, and study lots. School is starting, I need to get my act together. And be where I need to be in crew too.

Red Bean Paradise

So if you've ever been through an asian grocery store, or an authentic Chinese place, area, people, whatever.. You might've heard of this infamous "red bean" stuff that we people use as dessert. Beans? For dessert?

Well to first start off, it shouldn't be THAATT weird of a concept. Beans are treated like a basic starch oftentimes. Their texture, mushiness (yuck) etc. And besides, JELLY BEANS? HEHEELLOOOOOO! Haha. And vanilla "bean"? So the concept of sweet/dessert with the word bean isn't completely unfounded and exists in even Western food culture. But back to my concept of a starch, many types of starches can be both savory and sweet. Rice pudding is a prime example.. since the basic flavor of rice is pretty simple and modifiable, adding some shuga n' spice is all that you need to kick it up to being a dessert. Same things with beans.

I grew up with red bean soup, Cantonese style, all my life. Its one of the standard desserts that they give out after Cantonese banquets, or something to have on the chill at home for whenever, or to mix into ice cream or milk to make a red bean ice drink. ANything to sweeten it up will do well. J even suggested putting it on greek yogurt.

But until recently, I only knew of it as some bean.. just as red bean. But apparently it has a real name: azuki beans! They're tiny and much smaller than typical beans (more on this later and its implications on the flavors), and are dark red like so:


So to make red bean soup, one washes the beans first, they're relatively clean to begin with, but just for good measure. Then let them soak in water for however long you like. The longer the better, just makes cooking time that much shorter (or maybe that's just a myth). Then into a big pot, with lots of water, and boil. Sooooo simple. BUT from how I learned, not through the hard way, but just being taught, you boil for several hours, more like simmer, until they reach the desired softness.. I like them as mushy as.. well.. cooked beans, but my mother likes a little chew, so you can actually feel like you're eating the bean. At that point, you add sugar to taste. I went through almost half a pound of sugar on my last batch, but it was big.

Another thing you might want to add is some sort of citrus peel. My mom adds orange peels, a little bit, supposedly to offset the unfortunate side effect of beans (you know.. GAS). Perhaps there's an interaction between the citric acid, or some other chemicals in the skin. I like zesting a lemon, finely mincing the zest, and tossing it in with the beans once they're a little more concentrated. It ends up being fairly sweet (to your taste of course) and interestingly, to me it doesn't taste like beans. My THEORY on this is the fact that these beans are so small, so their surface to volume ratio is much greater than normal beans. As a result, its the inner starchiness that gives the bean flavor, and because these have less, less bean flavor! Voila!

Yoochoy, choy sum.. hiza-wha?!?!?

Mothers always tell you to eat your vegetables in American culture right? Well, my mom always told me to eat my choy. Choy, in Cantonese (maybe other dialects as well), refers to most types of leafy greens that the we, Cantonese people, often steam. Well, its not so much steaming, but quickly boiling.. like parboiling without the cooking afterwards part. The use of really hot boiling water, and throwing washed and picked greens, like the above choy sum (literally, heart of the greens), until they're just cooked through yet still very tender and crisp, and quickly taking them out again. A light coating of "cooked oil" (my mother always made a huge pot of boiling oil, would fry up a bit of potatoes or garlic into it just for flavor, and then reserve the oil in a bottle specifically for use in this purpose), and soy sauce would complete the dish. It leads to a very pure taste in the greens, not at all overcooked, and leaves a lot of texture to be savoured. Unlike many Western cooked greans, they're not a mashed up pile of.. who knows what. No cheese, no excessive use of cream. Pure, simple, healthy. Its the Cantonese counterpart to a crisp salad, nutrition wise, and is often the primary side-dish to most meals.

I was surprised to find this at Korean grocery store.. not so much cause it would be an unlikely candidate of their produce department, but simply that I hadn't seen much of this at all since not living near Chinatown. On my receipt from HanAhReum, this was named yoochoy as well. Never seen it like that before, but perhaps... I looked it up on wikipedia, and apparently its sometimes referred to as yu choy sum, as a whole. Interesting...

Well, this was a half of my lunch.. I made more onigiri today as the starch component of my meal. This time instead of splitting the rice into 3 obscenely large triangles, I went with 4 and decorated each differently. No need for pictures, they were gone immediately :)

Why Splenda is Safe

I finally looked it up on Wikipedia, and this is why sucralose, or otherwise known as Splenda, is safe.

Safety

Sucralose has been accepted by several national and international food safety regulatory bodies, including the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA), Joint Food and Agriculture Organization/World Health Organization Expert Committee on Food Additives, The European Union's Scientific Committee on Food, Health Protection Branch of Health and Welfare Canada and Food Standards Australia-New Zealand (FSANZ).The acceptable daily intake for sucralose is 5 mg / kg of body weight per day.

"In determining the safety of sucralose, FDA reviewed data from more than 110 studies in humans and animals. Many of the studies were designed to identify possible toxic effects including carcinogenic, reproductive and neurological effects. No such effects were found, and FDA's approval is based on the finding that sucralose is safe for human consumption." (FDA Talk Paper T98-16)

There is evidence that Sucralose can cause cancer. "Sucralose was weakly mutagenic in a mouse lymphoma mutation assay" (from DEPARTMENT OF HEALTH AND HUMAN SERVICES, Food and Drug Administration, 21 CFR Part 172, Docket No. 87F-0086 http://www.cfsan.fda.gov/~lrd/fr980403.html)

Concerns have also been raised about the effect of sucralose on the thymus gland, a gland that is important to the immune system. A report from NICNAS cites two studies on rats, both of which found "a significant decrease in mean thymus weight" at a certain dose.^[1] (These and other studies were considered by regulators before concluding that sucralose was safe.)

It should also be noted that the chlorine atoms are covalently bonded to the carbon atoms in the sucralose molecule, essentially making it a chlorocarbon. Many chlorocarbons are toxic; however, sucralose is unlike these chemicals because it is extremely poorly soluble in fat and does not store in fat like most chlorinated hydrocarbons. Sucralose does not break down or dechlorinate either.[1]

The bulk of sucralose ingested does not leave the GI tract and is directly excreted in the feces. The small amount that is absorbed from the GI tract is removed from the blood stream by the kidneys and excreted in the urine. Sucralose is digestible by a number of microorganisms and is broken down once released into the environment.

source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sucralose

But according to this following website, in which the above graphic was taken, splenda is oh-so-not-safe-because-it-contains-chlorine and is written by some hippie named Shirley.. :) source: http://www.shirleys-wellness-cafe.com/nutraswt.htm

It just pisses me off how people don't understand science and can make claims that something is unsafe based on scientific animal-modeled studies in which dosages are often 100-1000 times more than normal human consumption. Not only that, but they take those results out of context, for food safety tests have completely separate guidelines than toxicity level tests. EVERYTHING we eat has a certain toxicity and is consequently studied, and I have full confidence in the FDA for determining that sucralose is perfectly safe. Sure, no long term studies have been made regarding it, because it's only been in research for less than a few decades. But if it were a drug that would save your alcoholic hippie friends from killing their livers, would you wait for long-term results (postponing a much needed thing for half a century) before you released the drug, just to make sure it's safe, despite conclusive animal models and short term clinical trials that determine its safety?

In response to the thymus gland shrinking, well.. it naturally does that after you reach a certain age, and in response to weight loss as well. So naturally, one can say.. splenda causes severe weight loss and thymus shrinkage over time. OH NO! ;) Well, of course the rats were losing weight, it's calorie-free! WHatever their normal diets were, the calorie content of those sugars were being offset by splenda so naturally this would occur in studies. Noone's telling you to eat Splenda all day. And the fact that these were all taken into consideration before the FDA approved Splenda means the circumstances in which the studies were performed were not directly comparable to typical human consumption. Duh.

What BSt :) Get over your natural foods kicks, people. Food chemistry's where it's at.

My First Onigiri

I MADE MY FIRST ONIGIRI! This was my lunch today :P So with the Kokuho Rose medium grain white rice, I cooked it in my little rice cooker, mixed a bit of sushi rice vinegar, and folded it all in well. Then when it was cool, I wet my hands and formed these little triangles, and the whole time I couldn't help but exclaim to myself how cute they were :P THen I wrapped two of them in laver and well.. yum. I didn't feel like starting a new sheet of laver so I just sprinkled some nori fumi furikake on it.

Oh yeah, and I re-cooked some of my leftover beef stew to go along with it. I must say.. there wasn't much beef in it but that didn't really matter.

When You Were Young! New Killers!!!

Ah.. so poetic. The imagery in this music video is truly different, and although looks very traditional/old, it invokes a lot of timeless emotion that's out of the ordinary for music videos these days. Seeing this video really changed the meaning of the lyrics to me. Really refreshing. Adultery, what a lovely thing :)

HANAHREUM!!!!

I went to HanAhReum in Catonsville with J today. H-Mart (what they call it now apparently) is this big chain of big asian (more like Korean) supermarkets along the East Coast. They had so much good produce and I bought some choy sum and snow peas and super cheap chinese garlic. Dried udon noodles, chacharoni ramen, kokuho sushi rice, and rice vinegar for sushi. What's funny is that they call nori "laver".. I've never heard of it referred to as that before, but I got some of that too. Perhaps it's a Korean thing. Anyway, in addition to tofu, red bean daifuku, and pickled radishes.. I found these little fish wiener/sausages in the refridgerated section, and I was so intrigued by them that I bought them. I'll update when I finally decide to make them.... OH YEAH! and the most exciting part was that I found super cheap, frozen masago!!!!! Wow.. I really am on my way to bento boxing. Man, I should've brought my camera... but unfortch they didn't have any bento supplies there at H-Mart.

Then afterwards, the double T diner right across the intersection. I think the waiter was offended by the fact that we asked him if this was a Greek diner, and then consequently deciding out loud that the chicken souvlaki would be good there. Well, that's surely what I got and it was amazing. What disappointed me, however, was that in my mini-greek salad, there was definitely way more uncrumbled feta than there were vegetables. Naturally, I only ate about 3 of the blocks of feta and the rest of the veggies. But the souvlaki was really good. I really really wish I'd brought my camera.

They're OVER!

Never in my life have I had to deal with so many incompetent people for such an extended period of time. First.. those stupid other test takers, are so freakin' unassertive, they just stand there in line while the whole world passes them by, wondering if they should move forward.

ARgh.. and secondly, I was at the Wyndham from 7:15 AM until 6:40 PM. That's fucking ridiculous. They decided to throw all 200 of us in a big room, and then hand out each section of the exam individually, and only have 2 people doing it. I must've spent at least 3 hours sitting in that room, combined, just waiting for something to get picked up or something else to be passed out. Fucking retarded.

But it's over!

Octodogs!

Mmm.. yeah... so I've had a recent intrigue into the world of bento boxes, and apparently in the art of bento, cutting little hot doggies into cool shapes like squids and prawns and stuff, is pretty popular. But I ran across this American website that has this tool, called the OCTODOG maker, and it essentially turns it into this awesome thing...

Only the funniest part, was the instructions! Need I really say more?

But it's pretty awesome, go check it out!

http://www.octodog.net

New Title Image...

I'm trying to figure out how to put this pic up as my new title..



anyone know how?

Oooh, Can't Wait!

I've been watching too many of these.. types.. of movies lately, but I'm way excited for this one. It's more than sappy romance and shit. It's opening tomorrow at NYU and at the landmark in SF, but.. hopefully it'll come to something like the Charles soon.

The Conservative Agenda now has a Gay Son. Henry Kray is a young and sexually active student in college, fully enjoying his life on his own. However, things are not as convenient for his father, Jack Kray, a legendary right-wing Senator in a tight race for re-election. In a strategic political move, Senator Kray enlists Henry to be the “poster boy” for his campaign, hoping to attract the young vote. Unable to stand up to his father, Henry finds himself in a dilemma since he has yet to come out to his parents as a gay son. Henry's mother offers no refuge, as she has long been quiet and loyal, standing by her husband and his political career. With no one to turn to, Henry finds comfort in a stranger, a new friend named Anthony. But there is more to Anthony than Henry realizes. Anthony is a young activist determined to bring down the Senator and prevent his re-election. When Anthony discovers the truth behind the Senator's “poster boy” gimmick, he seizes the opportunity to expose the hypocrisy by getting close to Henry. However, complicating the situation, Anthony begins to develop a genuine relationship with Henry and is forced to choose loyalties between his cause and his new friend. Poster Boy is a timely and provocative story set against the explosive intersection of radical right-wing politics and increasing gay visibility. Inspired by the real-life story of lesbian Mary Cheney, daughter of conservative Vice President Dick Cheney, Poster Boy attempts to answer several volatile “what if” questions: What if you were the gay son of a right-wing Senator torn between family loyalty and your own moral compass? What if you were the wife of the Senator, having to choose between standing by your husband or standing by your own moral beliefs on truth, respect, and family? What if you were a gay activist holding a piece of information that would aid your cause but at the same time potentially hurt someone you have developed feelings for? Poster Boy is that exceptional film in 2006, a film unafraid to examine the stormy cultural wars that define the times in which we live.

http://posterboy-themovie.com

And while I'm at it, here's the trailer :P




Oh.. btw, I just noticed that in the movie Accepted, the initials for south harmon institute of technology, are S.H.I.T.... haha.. wow, am I that oblivious?

This is why I love where I live.

My grandmother, and the pescado en salsa. Amazing...

The whole sleugh of cousins, my brother, and I.

This is real Chinese Food...

Yeah.. she's actually wearing gold leggings. People these days..

Yup. It was awesome.

Mmmm.. real taquitos in Mountain View, right before Kelly Clarkson. The way real Mexican fare should be served: cheap, fast, intensely savory, and unfortunately slopped onto a plate.

Fresh fruit from the Cross St. Market.

Amazing still it seems,
I'll be 23.
I won't always love what I'll never have;
I won't always live in my regrets.

Simply Another Pedant

I found this fabulous book in the library. It is titled The Pedant In The Kitchen by Julian Barnes. I feel like his attitude toward cooking reflects mine exactly, including the dogmatic following of recipes, complete lack of truly creative cooking power, and just plain cursing in the damn kitchen when things go wrong. Here's an exciting excerpt:

Consider: you start with 2 tablespoons of oil, plus butter; you have added a glass of wine; there is the fat from the chops and the juice from the chicory. What do you get after fifteen minutes on a low heat with the lid on? You get about half a pint of something looking like pale veal stock. You're not told to reduce it; yet Nigel's third picture, on forensic examination, reveals the black splatter of heavy reduction.

I set the chops aside, left the chicory in the pan, and boiled the shit out of it. Thus did this 'thirty-minute supper' become a forty-minute one. From time to time, I would scrape at the squeak-clean bottom of the pan with a wooden spatula, growling 'Goeey bits, gooey bits' in a tone some might judge filled with wise yet fierce irony and others might find barking mad. Eventually the dish was deilvered to the table. and the following lessons were absorbed..

using the cross light at the den, from the beds :)

a looming sort of comfort..

the colors of apex

more mt. vernon at night. cross light effect is pretty coool!

jealous? they were so good, and so were the cheese fries! lovely way to end a horrible race in philly.

mt. vernon by night.. super coool!

guac and red corn tortilla chips, yum

Success!

It was great! We however, made a small modification to the menu. Added bruschetta appetizers with grilled italian bread, mozarella, basil, and a cherry tomato topping. Rachel made a dried fruit couscous that went well with everything. Emily brought an awesome avocado, mango, black bean salad. For dessert, we had fruit skewers, grilled, and topped with cream. And grilled, halved bananas. And Rachel's blueberry-peach cobbler as well.

Things to remember for next time, bring more charcoal if you plan on grilling for 5 hours straight, and the corn takes freakin' forever! Otherwise, it was one of the easiest things ever, just a lot of prep work that was totally worth it in the end. Rachel and Jeremiah were there with me from the way beginning, and so were Emily and Pete. Helena and her friend Ellen stopped by for a good while, Nana came by with some quick entertainment from Morty, and finally Becca showed up with the hebrew nationals :)

Then, went to the harbor to see fireworks... who knew that the barge closer to the inner harbor would only have fireworks every 5 minutes?

Pre-View July 4th Picnic

So Rachel and I have been planning this for a while.

Recently got a mini grill so we could have a picnic for July 4th wherever we wanted, and the proper heating source as well.


Our plan: to find a nice place outside in the shade and have a great picnic, but as things often do in the culinary adventures of Hopkins Crew, things go from fun and simple to fun and extravagant


the current menu, estimated for roughly 8 and several hours of cooking fun:

grilled corn with lime butter. butter mixed with lime juice and fresh zest, spread over corn, which is then rehusked and grilled on hot coals to allow the butter to absorb while the corn maintains its moisture.

simple vegetable skewers. cubed zucchini, whole white button mushrooms, red onion chunks, bell pepper pieces. olive oil, coarse sea salt, freshly cracked pepper. fired up on the grill on bamboo skewers.

grilled herb shrimp, ina garten style. peeled jumbo shrimp garnished with fresh parsley, basil, garlic, and shallots, in a lemon-mustard marinade. skewered and quickly grilled after marinating overnight.

for dessert... possibly grilled fruit (yeah, going with the grilled theme here, nice and slow, we have all day) fresh strawberries, peach halves, large, sweet summer fruits, carmelized under flame.

and sandra lee style cocktail time. if I can find good peaches or nectarines.. making a white sangria to put on ice.. yum. peach nectar, lots of fresh fruit, a bottle of white wine, Cointreau, and bubbly club soda, on ice, garnished with more fruit.


comments: still deciding whether or not having shrimp as the only protein will be enough. granted its mostly coxswains and their friends, the meat fiends won't necessarily be an issue, but perhaps some chicken skewers in a similar citrus marinade will help placate any that might show up.

mr. del monte

sometimes... dinner just isn't that complicated...

My Secluded Life version.052806-060506

So this has been what's been happening. My family came on the 28th. I got my birthday present! A Casio Exilim EX-Z850 camera, its really nice, so I've been taking a lot of pictures. I took my family around Baltimore: Federal Hill, Inner Harbor, Fells Pt., etc. Anyway, so we finished packing up, made a huge mess, it was interesting having my parents and my brother living under the same roof in my tiny apartments. But yeah, lots of packing. I didn't realize how much stuff there was. The same on the 29th. Early morning on the 30th, we got the UHaul, had it all packed by 10:30, and went straight to the new place. unloaded by 1. And it was amazing. And all was well for the time. Then on the 31st we went to Medieval Times for my birthday. It was really great, and mainly cause it was a big joke and there were like 500 middle schoolers behind us yelling and screaming about the knights. It was pretty ridiculous, but it was fun, and it was my first time back at the Arundel Mills Mall since.. well.. freshman year orientation. QUite a long time... And because I started this post so long ago, I don't remember what I was going to write anymore :P But whatever. I need to get on with newer things in life.. At some point we went up to Long Island to
visit some relatives, my second cousin from HK going to high school there..

And I can't figure out how to layout pictures.. I suck at this...

In Transition

Post Pending... with lots of pics!

Yummy

I saw this ad yesterday while on the metro in DC.. it makes me sick. On the topic of making myself sick.. all I've had to eat today is cheese and confetti cake. I should probably find something for dinner soon.

One more week til my parents are here! I have so much to pack, so much to clean, so many things to take care of... we'll see how well it all gets done. Now back to work!

And It All Begins To Fall Into Place

I'm excited for this summer. I'll have time to study, time to grow, time to concentrate on the things I need to do to make myself a better person. I have the time, energy, motivation, and means to do something about it, and I'll soon be able to at least perceive what the ideal is, if even just for a glimpse or a taste.

I'm finally done with all these pesky finals. Personality theory wasn't as bad as it could've been. Inorganic, well, that was tough. I didn't get much sleep last night. But alas, it is now summer, and I'm now a senior. I have time to get my stuff together, to leave this apartment and what it is to me, and move on. something new. Not too much will change, but it'll help me get rid of certain memories hopefully.

Maybe I'll be having some fun tonight. I've kinda avoided friends for the moment. I'm kinda at the point in those weird relatinoships, where you don't know if it should be more than what it started out as.. possibly considering something more? At least that's what I think we're at, maybe the feelings aren't being returned, but who knows.

Man, I need to shower :P I've been in the same clothes, on and off, for at least a while. My ulcers are getting slightly better, and this ice cream certainly helps. Edy's Slow Churned vaniall bean. Yum.

The Anesthetic Never Set In

its not you, it's just the freudian escape mechanism of transferrance


trying to concentrated on finals, having a really hard time


this is starting to sound like my xanga.. but i guess i have no choice since its how i'm feeling right now


don't know what i should say to him. i don't know what i want to do. i want someone to convince me that i should. is this exactly where you'd like me?


why wasn't last night any fun for me? i'd rather sleep on a couch, not even because i had a lot to drink... the people there, the whole environment, it's different. it's not like the old parties.


i've had absolutely no desire to eat as of late. i kinda forced myself to go grocery shopping today... making some soup. chicken/chana masala.. white rice. didn't really know how to deal with the masala, but just did tomatoes, garam masala, lots of garlic, onion, pepper, cumin, chili powder...

If You're Gonna to Preach, Preach With Conviction

So the main thing that's wrong with me and relationships is I become too dependent on trying to attain the ideal status. Like me and studying... and me and crew.. and me and people. Perhaps I should just stop trying to be the best, and settle for what I have. It really is amazing how music, a long drive, buying drugs, and downing an entire Chipotle burrito can make you feel better.

Don't pretend you've never been there. I guess my only frustration is the fact that my senior year.. my last chance to prove myself. To get into gradschool, to work on my people skills before I leave this school, to make the best of Maryland and what I might have here. To figure out what I need to do to stay polite without tearing myself up inside.



What 48 hour rule? I'm not even racing...

Just "Lust A Prima Vista"

And all at once it became clear to me.

Only it didn't.

But nevertheless, the guy I took at the sprint in the single and beat by half a second last year at MACCC's? Well, he was the guy I was racing today. And despite massive support from our own 8, William and Mary, and Rob from UMaryland, I lost it in the last 500, being only half a boatlength ahead for the entire race, and sprinting too early. Too early, too little, and he took me at the sprint this time. Alas, I still medaled, but he surely came back with a vengeance.

My excuse is that I've only practiced in the single 3 times all year. And have coxed the rest of the time, while he's actually raced as a rower... For that guy's size and experience, he should've won by way more than 4 seconds at the sprint, pretty damn good if you ask me.

Men's 8, 5th in Grands. Women's 4, gold in the 4's. NMen's 4, silver in grands. NWomen'4, 5th in Grands. Oh yeah, and the Michelle/Renee pair got gold too. Not too bad especially for the women. They're really stepping it up this season.

And I'm now officially done. Alas, I'll still go to practice and sit in the launch, but done is done regardless of whether or not I go to practice, right?

Tonight though, after the regatta, made dinner for the coxswains and captains for next year. Majorly fun. Though it took quite a bit of planning and prep, it worked out. Fresh white corn and red onion salad with a ginger-soy dressing. Followed by lime-ginger scented jasmine rice, accompanied by Mr. Yoshida's marinated chicken with green onions, plain roasted carrot spears, and fresh roasted asparagus sprinkled with parmesean. Finally to round it all out, some vanilla ice cream, a quick warm strawberry sauce from frozen berries, and fresh strawberries. For 12 people! And Lukasz said he was full! That's... that's...






Still waiting for that next big thing to come into my life to keep me goin' on.

For One Day Only

A cut above the rest. Better than anyone else. Understanding what's best and doing it.

I wish for once I had a good idea of the decisions I should make. I can't ask what I want. I can't do what I need to. I'm afraid of confronting what should be dealt with. And not doing so breaks up the continuity of my sanity. Dwelling on something for so long I can't seem to realize how significant they become. How incredibly difficult they are to finally resolve. Only to be put off.

Last pasta dinner for the year was tonight. I'm so glad cause I've definitely been burnt out. Cooking's great and all, but not when I don't have enough time. I never have enough time. Even on a Saturday, I'm running between grocery stores, the farmer's market. A 2 hour session on the beach with stressbusters... and 30 backrubs later, cook nonstop basically for 3 hours. My feet want to fall off. I'm dehydrated. I have to race in a few hours.

And for what? Is it to prove a certain pain or responsibility tolerance. Life doesn't have to be as elaborate as it is now. Why go for the best possible, or the best that we can manage. The best that I can manage. What am I proving, who am I trying to impress? Nothing work, I need to stop being so selfish.

There's more to be attained, there are greater things than just one race.. or 10. I hope. I really hope, cause I don't know what all my energy's working for right now otherwise.

A Bit of a Countdown

29 days til my birthday. 27 days til my parents come and help me move. 24 days til this year's commencement and my pre-birthday drunken party with clare. 17 days til my last final and the start of summer. 15 days til the end of the year bbq. 12 days til the end of our 05-06 crew season (and subsequent party!). 6 days til i defend my silver medal in the single at MACC's (hopefully). 4 days until i'm done with french elements.

so what's been up recently? last week, crew formal. way fun. clare was my date, she in lauren's olive/dark green dress, me in my charcoal suit with a grey shirt and a black textured kenneth cole tie. i needed something to match with clare, so i went to the florist, got her a few stems.. a fern, a stem of red alstromeria, and two white gerbera daisies. the green tissue paper it was wrapped in was way lame.. so i cut the stems really short, took some kitchen twine, and wrapped a handle down the stems. it looked pretty awesome. i also took some of the cut fern leaves and stuck one in my breastpocket.. i really should have pinned it there cause it kept falling. but.. it was hot.

on another note.. have guys always matched their girls at formals? or is this something new that's recently come about? we did it back home at proms and such, but i didn't see any of it here at all.. until our formal this time where it seemed like everyone was concerned about matching. i, of course, always cater to my date :P whatever, totally not a big deal.

anyway, then vacarro's afterwards. then had ACLS in york this past weekend. cox'd the 8, but basically done coxing for the season now. just finished my last midterm today. just 2 finals and done for the year.

so it's been bugging me that i'll probably be rowing like every other day now. especially in this last week of serious rowing. everyone knows the week before vails is just a major taper.. so this is basically the last week of serious work. super-lame.

boys will be boys.

i've had a very weird eating schedule lately. i get hungry late at night... i probably shouldn't have gorged myself on saturday. it's been a while since i've approached so many calories in one day, without relieving them somehow.. no matter now, weight's irrelevant. whatever.. i needed it.

i've been downloading like a maniac again. i finally got rid of my crappy quality mp3's, well some of them, and am downloading whole albums. imogen heap, panic! at the disco, benassi bros., rihanna.

some things that have been annoying me lately... my bamboo won't grow evenly, one of the stalks is kind of stunted. totally sick of pchem and trying to get this damn sodium lab done. not having studied the right topic for my personality midterm. my apple juice bottles being too big to fit in my fridge. still living in this crappy apartment.... i can't wait to move at the end of this month!

Four to the Floor, Stuffed to the Brim

Wow, spring fair weekend has definitely dealt me a major blow. Amidst all the funnel cakes, smoothies, turkey legs, and chicken on a sticks, I've consumed so much food in the past 3 days that I'm keeling over! But it was all quite good, and I'm certainly even more thankful that this only happens once a year, really. It was just much too convenient walking out of the library to see a massive expanse of food vendors, all at my beck and call.

Speaking of the library, I fell asleep in there today for quite some time...

Hum, so we didn't have a regatta this weekend. Last weekend at the Invitational, finally one of our Hopkins boats got a medal, the varsity women's 4 of Laura, Ellie, Angela, and Becky. Our men's 8 was 5 and some seconds off of Loyola, getting second, in the race. No comment there, it was a good race, but alas, things that could have been helped weren't things that could have been done during the race anyway, so it was good despite it all.

Its scary to think that so many people took the MCATs yesterday, Theodore included, and that if I had a bit more diligence, it could have been me as well. But unfortunately, poor planning and my general inability to focus leaves me a bit lacking again. August.. here we come. I also should plan for GRE's this summer as well... do they have set test dates or are they something you just go in and take?

I've decided to narrow down my gradschool options. Masters in genetic counseling, or doctorate in genetics, or in nutrition/public health nutrition. Since I can't decide on what I need to focus on, I just need to bite the bullet and choose something. For now at least. Now I need to find some way of researching programs and finding what's good and what's not. Hopefully doing so will give me a bit more insight on what I should be doing in general. It'll be difficult when I ask for recommendations for so many places, so many programs, with so many focuses. How do I manage that and explain that to a professor I'm not exactly too familiar with?

I got lots of free t-shirts lately. And I'm excited about moving. Ariel, when will you be in Baltimore in the near future? I might be in my new apartment, I move at the end of May. I'm so glad my entire family decided to come out and visit and stay with me for that whole moving process. Since hiring moves will cost a few more hundreds of dollars than I was expecting, we're just going to do it ourselves, which will be difficult, but in the end, the money I save is like.. the value of at least half the furniture that I own anyway.

And Rachel, Emily, Helena and I are planning on having awesome get-togethers this summer. Coxswain action, here we come!

Working Toward The Impossible

I hate the gym. Why can't I enjoy running, or doing the elliptical, or erging. My head starts hurting, I feel dehydrated even though I know I'm not.

Tomorrow: Hopkins Invitational. Varsity men are putting out a pair and the V8. Women, 2 V4's. Novice men, 4 and an 8, and the Novice women, a 4, 8, and a pair.

Let's see if we medal. Occoquan Sprints were a bit of a disappointment medal-wise, save the novice women's 4 who blew away the competition in their heat. Knecht was last weekend. Rainy weather, fast crews, guy's V8, in the varsity event, didn't make it into petites even, but good effort. VW8, made it into finals in D2/D3, and did well considering as such. Novice women got cancelled, and NM8 got 2nd to Wash Coll.

So that's the update on crew stuffs. More to come later when I finally get my 5 hours of sleep... I need to find a good way to call out maintaining power as approaching the sprint, and to not get confused with counting, calling stroke rate/splits/distances/time, calling up power and 10's, and comparing positions with other boats, and steering all at the same time. I really hope I'm getting better... now time to write out some calls to remember for tomorrow...

Time to Decide

So, I've been seriously considering genetic counseling now. But, perhaps it isn't right for me. It seems as though the programs are all relatively difficult to get into, seeing as how most institutions accept 5-12 new masters students into the program each year. But requirement-wise, it is currently manageable.

That's mainly to give me time to become ready for medical school. So genetic counseling is a stepping stone for me to get into medical school.

But why do I want to go to medical school? The only thing I can see myself enjoying, at the moment, is anesthesiology. I'd like to work in acute care, but yet, something about the patient-practitioner relationship bugs me... an anesthesiologist greatly interacts with a patient, but in a manner that just seems right to me. Just take all the crap I'm telling you, shut up, and go to sleep :)

AND.. so.. that's what I want to do. But that's like what, 2 years for gradschool, plus 4 for medschool, then however many for residency, ASSUMING I get into a residency for anesthesiology.

And now, I look, and I find a program at Case, or Emory, for Anesthetists, Anestesiologist Assistants. They can administer anesthesia under supervision, and training is just over 2 years to get a MS. After those 2 years, and going through exams, bam.. right into job that's comparable to ones that Nurse Anesthetists hold, 6 figures.

That's what I want to do.

I don't want to be uber smart, or know a lot about medicine, I really just want to stick things in people, tell them to count to 10, and knock 'em out. Then make sure they don't die while staring at a computer, watching the cool surgeries. Then bring em back. And get paid.

But the catch is, there are only 3 programs in all of the US that offer just an AA masters degree. And according to case, the average MCAT score for accepted students is 25. I just happen to have a C in orgo, and no possibility of taking a year of anatomy with lab and a physiology course because Hopkins Undergrad is lame like that.

Sigh. Sounds like genetic counseling it is then...

Waiting for the Breakdown

So last night was the first time I've gotten more than 5 consecutive hours of sleep in a night. 8 hours in fact, and even despite the fact that yesterday was a pasta dinner!

Its been a pretty busy week, among all the lab reports, homework assignments, getting exams back, I haven't done much studying, but yet I'm so incredibly tired. Yesterday was the worse because I only got 2 hours on Thursday night, and yet I still went to class, went to the grocery store, prepped for the pasta dinner (chopped onions, roasted vegetables and garlic), went back to class, prepped some more, walked to Keswick, played bingo and carted old people around for 2 hours, walked back, finished cooking (an overcooked meat sauce and an over-sweetened roasted vegetable tomato sauce), and attempted some semblance of socialization amidst the crazy spaghetti cooking scheme I was attempting.. to come home and crash before 10.

It was worth it. I feel much more rested, my body at least. My head, still hurts a bit. But no matter. Today's the Casperson Cup, hosted right here in Baltimore. I'll be coxing the varsity 4. From stroke, its Greg, Chris, Wesley, and Josiah, in the Evans. I always have my qualms about being in a 4 where the next race is only an hour away.. but I guess it works itself out. We'll get some pretty awesome footage from the bridge (hopefully).

So Coach has been critiquing our coxing techniques. I find it immensely helpful, just difficult to implement. When I first learned to cox, I was always told to do everything, absolutely everything, in the 2 part call with calling 1, 2, etc. I guess this change has something to do with the two part, using "ready, now!" instead of 1, and 2, and not calling the "in 2". Perhaps it is still useful for drills and land events, but I can see the logic in a race, or during sprint pieces. Thinking about having to do something, without doing it, over a period of 4 strokes is often conducive to preparing oneself, in the bad sense of storing energy, opening and breathing more, which in turn can lead to lost boat speed. And counting everything out, which I am often likely to do, makes moves very obvious. Not to mention, Joel dislikes our secret pieces and finds "2 seat your rigger's broken" distracting. Oh well.

More on that later.

Anyway, any opinions? I'll update post-race to tell how we did too. We have boats in every event, hopefully we can take the Cup again this year.

Ok, time to make my index card.

---break---

No cup. But a few medals. Got first in WV4, MV2-, MV4, and MV8. Yeah, we swept the men's varsity events, with some awfully pretty DVD-potential footage to boot. And also my first coxswain "tossing". Well.. rather, my first coxswain "getting dumped with a lot of water" due to the health risks of the Baltimore Harbor. Hah.

It was exciting, yes. A little sad. But good. But I'm not feeling fantastic. Perhaps the drowsiness of the Tylenol Cold I'm taking is finally setting in. Perhaps I'm just fighting this inevitable, chemically-induced sleep that I need so badly.

This Optimistic Fantasy

Its been a crazy past few days, but I guess it'll all be worth something in the end. Saturday ended up being a nice little row, then lots of loading and packing and cleaning, and for once, we weren't sent back to reclean our bunks cause I spent a lot of time sweeping and getting everything clean. The bus ride was somewhat pleasant, lots of movies, had my own seat, and finally got to eat at Wendy's. Gotta love those Frosty Frozen Desserts :)

Arrived in Baltimore around 8/9 pm, come home to find out that.. my lease isn't going to be renewed for the upcoming year. Some frat, likely Pike, is moving into the Briarley and taking over. Lots of headaches, didn't do laundry, didn't do much at all but try and deal and crashed by 11. Sunday was a bit better, oh wait, no it wasn't. Missed a lot of what I shouldn't have, couldn't do laundry all day long because the machines were taken up. Instead looked up some graduate programs. Genetic counseling sounds interesting now too.. but I don't have any sort of counseling experience.

Had dinner at Niwana that night, with Wesley, Bobby, Katie, Teddy and Clare-bob. Love the Korean appetizers, and edamame with not quite enough salt. Then got the Niwana Udon which was a bit too fishy for my taste, certainly not getting it again, but on the whole, wasn't disgusting. Went to the house and watched Copenhagen, which I thought I'd hate because its about the two men that have made my life hell in PChem and consequently, made me let go of the chemistry major. But it was interesting, and I do love soundtracks that consist primarily of oboe solos.

Monday, morning, unloading. Very cold feet, as a result of wet socks from washing boats. But came home, and was very productive until class. Managed to do 2 loads of laundry (crew stuff and essentials), cleaned out the dishes, made more rice water/soup/porridge to help push down the ulcers in my mouth, and even took an hour and a half nap. French, wandered around, got yelled at by the registrar women for not receiving my transcript but still wanting to request one, got lots of veggies, pita bread, cheddar slices, and cilantro hummus at Eddies and had a nice meal. THen off to the library, met up with Clare, headed to personality theory.. I truly do love that class the most, why am I not a psychologist?

Then our usual post-class get-together/talk in the hallway sans Wesley, decided to go do the Vaccaro's Monday Night thing, at request of Greg because Brit's gone for the week. Came home, did some more dishes, at some more of what I had for lunch, slaughtered a chicken to make the soup my mother wants me to with the Chinese ingredients she sent to me so long ago.. that's on the stove. Really wish I had time to go to the gym...

So looking to maybe move in with Nana for next year. My option was initially to move into campus housing, but I get kicked out of here end of June, I'd then have to sublet somewhere for 2 months, then move into campus housing in September, and find storage for all my crap.. which is way more work than is worth. 1 bedrooms that are reasonable are scarce and I definitely need the full kitchen, so perhaps this arrangement with Nana will work out. Looking at a small complex called the Alps at Tuscany, a few blocks north of One World, by the Calvert School. Its really cute, from the pictures.

Well, off to stuff my face with fantastic Italian desserts.. I'll make sure I get at least a strawberry granita :)


P.S. Hey Ariel! I'm glad you're reading my posts now. The editor I use has a T and a color palette button at the top when you're editing, so I use that to change the colors :)

---break---

Oh man, a hot chocolate, cream puff, diet coke, vanilla gelato with strawberries in a waffle bowl, and a strawberry smoothie later.. I'm stuffed, and majorly sick. My head hurts, I want to throw up, but man it was so good! Basically $24 worth of sugar and pain, for only $16. Not bad, Greg had like $30 worth.

And now, comes the lab report, which I don't even understand. Oops?

All We're Left With Is Memories

Friday night. Departure from Camp Bob. 15 hours away. Totally tired. This year's been different. Lots of trading. Lots of videotaping. Lots of feedback. Pretty awesome. Feel like I've really strengthened some of my relationships with people. Others, unfortunately, were a little ignored. I just don't have the energy to sit up and stay up with people past 10/11 at night. I love the later practices, and practicing so many times a day. It's so much easier to fix things and do what needs to be done.

The weather wasn't fantastic this year. But the mood was tremendously more optimistic and amicable. The food has been horrible as usual. And the n-men's "initiation" had turned only into a sideshow to the now-annual novice women's non-initiation crew orientation talent show. Took out a coxswain quad earlier in the week. And today, we took out a coxswain coxed four, with (from bow to stern) Emcox, Helena, Raskob, and I, and Gregor coxing. Quite entertaining, but somewhat painful at times. I don't know why my knee's been acting up so. Tomorrow, 7am wakeup, last practice here in S.C., then the long drive back home. No Sonic nighttime ice-cream social bonding. No Aiken regatta to whomp ass at. But an entire week back in Baltimore to prepare for next weekend for a double regatta weekend. Casperson Cup back home in Baltimore for once, and then Occoquan Sprints immediately following, which has always been unsuccessful in years past.

I've done none of my work this break. Should do some outlining for Inorganic, Iodine lab writeup for Pchem Lab, some reading for Ptheory, and a practice Kaplan full-length on Sunday. Saturday night will be tough. But at some point.. I'll manage.. as I usually do.

Good night. 'Til we meet again, back home in MD, back where the food is halfway decent and cooked mostly under my hands.

Febreze, Thank You So Much!

Monday night, second day full day at Camp Bob. It rained a bit today, was mostly overcast, but yet, my face still feels like its been sunburnt alot. Yesterday, on Sunday it was pretty nice, not hot but fairly warm, but maybe just a little bit from then has stayed in me. Today however everyone got wet, and our entire room smells like.. nasty :) Thanks to Febreze, our space heater, and the fan, we can circulate and mask the smell quite a bit.

On another note, the food is way worse than in years past. They're even regulating how much pasta you can take, which is absolutely ridiculous. For brunch today, the only thing I really managed to eat was the cream of broccoli soup, with the little fried potato cubes dropped in to give it some more thickness. Pretty good idea eh?

Anyway, off for now.

Smelling Clean Air For A Change

Finally at Camp Bob Cooper. Last night was hectic, amidst all my errands, a run to Giant, dinner at Rocky Run, and a trip to Remsen to let someone in, I managed to not have the time to clean, do laundry, or make snacks for the trip. And those lab calculations for PChem, well, they only got half done because I ran into some difficulty. On the whole, it was alright, I got a little bit of sleep, and although I woke up with a swollen eye, my mouth still hurting, and a few new cuts and scrapes here and there, I was ok. Then as I slowly drag all my bags over to the AC, I go to Remsen to turn in my calculations, and I leave my keys.. in the mailbox room. Which is locked on several levels. I panic, and I finally have the great idea to see if I left the door ajar inside Remsen 101, and thankfully, it was.

A nice bus ride down, sat with Laura in the friddle. ( For you non-wombination folk, thats the front-middle) And relatively enjoyable, slept a bit, watched Mulan, then had lunch at Bojangles (I somehow managed to not get chicken, but sides of cole slaw, mashed potatoes, and dirty rice, along with half a dozen of biscuits) then a small trip to BK for chicken tenders and a vanilla shake. Then we watched Wallace and Grommit, Curse of the Were-Rabbit! It was a really good movie, as most W&G things are, so it was enjoyable. Then we watched some 80's movie.. Better Off Dead, and then we were at Camp Bob! Rigged up all the boats already, quite a feat I'd say, am rooming with Teddy, Bobby and Pete in the bunks, and had a horrible dinner.

But on the whole, I'm so glad I'm here, I hope it helps me de-stress, because I think that's the main cause of what's making my health go to the shits. And ideally, I'll get the chance to do so damage this spring break. Sounds fun, a little ominous, but exciting.

A Small Can of Goodness

So my joke didn't work so well, mainly because the punchline wasn't actually carried out...

But that was at the sacrifice of completing my homework and studying more for inorganic, which I failed anyway. Why can't I seem to undersetand the material despite running it through my system so much.. being completely unable to process it all. But it's finally over, and I officially know what I need to do now to study effectively. I better study some more crystal and ligand field theory in the event that it ever comes up again.

I've had so much caffeine today. Made lots of tea during the night, got a steamer and blueberry cake-bread from cafe Q (ok, so its not relaly caffeine), a 20 oz. diet, a Starbucks espresso double shot in a can. It's definitely a shot. A shot of happiness and nerve-calmin... nevermind, my hands are now quivering so that's hardly calming.

My french oral was much easier than I thought it'd be, but I can't seem to remember my vocabulary very well. It's difficult to just bust out so many things at once, and I find myself stuck and at a loss of what to say.

Ksenija will let me turn in my calculations a bit later, but that means I have to have them turned in by tomorrow morning when I leave for South Carolina. I love late night runs to Remsen, cause it's not technically breaking in if you have the key to the building...

Still have to do laundry, pack, clean, do the dishes, make more chex mix, assemble crap. Oh.. will it all get done? I surely hope so, while all I want to do is crash. And now that Teddy's ditched me also, I have to go to Keswick on my first day all by my lonesome, and learn how to push old farts around by myself? and then play bingo? Hoooorrayyyy.

My pessimism is surely a result of my lack of rest. Hopefully this will help me zonk out while on the bus tomorrow.

The Taste of Chemicals

In my mouth. Stiff upper lip. Mouth ulcers not getting better. Hard to eat what I want. Pretty docking today, despite the wetness and induced numbness from bowloader, off to starboard. Salty and bitter is the taste. Salty from the salt water, bitter from ????

So on the plate for the day: shower, inorganic class, something to eat, then maybe a small nap, then some major inorganic studying/homework. Hopefully I'll be diligent until the evening when maybe a Costco trip will be in order to get those fantastic Gummy Bears (the 5lb-er!) and other accessory snacks. Then back to studying, and maybe some sleep for the night.

And by the way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARIEL! Although it's probably too late for you to see this anwyay, I guess the gesture's still there.

---break---

Suffering through Inorganic is almost impossible. I sit there and try to stay awake and listen.. but when an hour and a half are spent on 2 slides.. I don't get quite enough visual stimulation to stay awake, especially that soon after a crew practice. And why is it that I never seem to get enough sleep on Wednesday nights anymore? It must be Top Chef...

Ok, time for a nap.. just hunger strike for a little longer and it'll be lunchtime...

---break---

Chicken tastes so much better when reheated and drenched in its own fat that melts right over it. Yum :) Anyway, I think my cheese danish is also at the end of its lifetime. And the black from burning my pot lid that I thought was ruined.. is definitely ruined.

I never seem to wake up from naps when I plan to. Setting an alarm for 1 o'clock basically means I won't wake up til 2. I'll finish eating at 2:40, finish showering and tooting around by 3ish, complain about how I"m still tired online for a bit, repack my computer and head to the library.

I think my methods of studying are slightly counterproductive. I have just over 12 hours left til my exam, and 5 long chapters in inorganic to complete, and I'm slowly trudging and outlining my first chapter, somewhat unproductively...

Is it really so serious?

---break---

So another few hours wasted. Only 8 hours now til the exam... Watched the grassroots of hiphop on VH1, have listened to my new mix about 40 times through, got through 2 and a part of the big chapter in Inorganic. I still have the chapter 5 and 6 homeworks to complete, to finish remembering the info from chapter 7...

My stomach's been acting especially bad. And my mouth has gotten worse since I took the medicine for my stomach yesterday. The disharmony in my immune system is really screwing with me lately, as my ulcers haven't gone away in a month and a half now, that's the longest I've had them around since.... since probably during high school.

I really want to bake. But my apartment looks like a pack of angy dogs have run through it. Unfortunately, when that happens, I can't seem to do anything until I clean it. And at this point, its not much of an option. I just made myself some strong tea, and shall try to endure the rest of the night.

To Dine Or Not To Dine

So Kaplan has been this looming, dark force that sits above me and is attempting to push me down into submissiveness. Therefore, I will not be attending my damn verbal class tonight. I will however, eat my oranges.

On the note of oranges, I had one from my frigo this morning. Let's just say, they've been in there since I've come back to Maryland.. back at the beginning of January. I'd have expected them to be moldy or disgusting, but they were perfectly tart, slightly sweet, and definitely very fresh, if you can call that fresh despite the mental barriers I'm giving myself.

On another note, the blood oranges I bought a few weeks ago.. I either need to juice them and mix them with a stiff amount of vodka, or just eat them and enjoy their redness. Although I could probably use it to marinate something nice and tasty also..

After French, I randomly met up with Sunny, who was going to be having lunch with Holly, whom we met at Niwana, along with Ernesto. Today was definitely the day of re-encountering people I hadn't spoken to in a while. Lunch at Niwana was quite good, I technically ordered the vegetable tempura udon, but our slightly hot, slightly gangsta (I'll explain later) waiter got me the vegetable tempura box instead. First time I'd ever had panko-covered, tempura-fried lettuce, or some other type of leafy, curly green that I couldn't discern.

And afterwards, he said the picture on my debit card was quite "gangsta". We each had a nice laugh, in addition to the comment Holly got about a tasty beverage..

Then in personality theory, our professor attempted to hypnotize us. It worked for a little bit, especially in the motor sensations, but I just couldn't feel that mosquito or that sweet cadbury cream taste in my mouth. Then Greg had to go ahead and start chuckling when she spoke of stiffness and getting harder...

---break---

And.. I almost burnt down my apartment. Nana gave me a call for a quickie to the Columbia mall. Little did I remember, I had just a few minutes beforehand put something into a pot to steam. Well, let's just say after wandering around the Columbia mall, some talking with Carly, a stroll through Old Navy, and getting some chicken from Chicken-Out (which, for the record, has fantastic red-skinned mashed potatoes with the perfect salt content...), I returned home to a burning sensation smell that permeated every last corner of my apartment. I immediately checked the stove, and what do I see. Holy crap, my large sauté pan is burnt black, what's in it is ruined, and the teflon nonstick was basically.. well.. no longer sticking. Crap, that was a nice pan too, we had a nice history :)

And so what was also ruined was the lid, which was interchangeable with my 4qt pot, the steamer rack I had inside, and the cute square C&B plate I bought over the summer with Ariel. Sigh. And also, all my clothes I had on at the moment smelled like smoke, I think actually most of the clothing in my apartment smells like smoke now since I have most of the things I care about hung up in my walk-in which usually collects most of the smells of my apartment because it's a dead room as far as circulation.. And then I forgot about salsa, with Laura, and I smelled like smoke, burnt, crap there too.. so my self-esteem was ruined as well. AND we had to alternate partners, I couldn't even feel confident that my partner wasn't judging my mistakes...

Top Chef, I'm glad the foofy, organic, veggie lady's gone now. Although Stephen pisses me off, his minimalist presentation in the quickfire presentation was very reminscent of the appetizer dish I once posted on my xanga with the asian soup spoons with a bite of appetizer in each. Very clean, using espresso cups to present.. althought I hate him as a person, Mr. Sommélier can stick it...

I don't understand how people can endlessly eat, and not realize that they're doing so. Like seeing someone pick up a bag of chips or whatever snack, and just down it like it was nothing. Snacks are not meant to constitute meals, the reason why they're called snacks is that they are meant to be eaten in smaller quantities than meals.... no further comment...

A Reincarnation

So to begin, I will say that I had a few bites of an Entenmann's cheese-filled crumb cake to start off my day along with what was left of my milk.

The last of my milk, was to be the completion and culmination of 2 days' worth of milk drinking, although the majority of it was consumed last night, when I managed to put too much of Emeril's cajun seasoning into my chicken, onions, and mushroom sauté, with tri-color cous cous, cooked in chicken boullion. Yeah, it wasn't as good as it sounds because, although I cooked with double D's (my chicken breast was 3 times as large as one normally is), there was a disproportionate amount of mushrooms and onions to chicken, because I didn't feel like saving only a third of the mushrooms I had, knowing I didn't have too much else to cook it with. The cous cous however, came out fantastically.

1/4 cup of cous cous is certainly not 1 serving size. It's like, a third of a typical serving size, and that's a conservative estimates.

And so enough about last night's dinner. Well.. not really, because that's what I had for lunch.

And between French class and doing my lab calculations and prelabs, and going to lab, I managed to head over to the house and chill with Wesley, and watched Michael Chiarello rant about "cheese food". I must say though, I do really like cheese food when it comes as Kraft singles. It's one of those disgusting things that remind me of my childhood.. like Wonderbread.

Like the Wonderbra, disgusting yet so incredibly tasty.

And so Food Network, and I brought Chex Mix, home-made, with lots of good ingredients. Corn and Rice Chex obviously, sourdough pretzel bites, peanuts, and roasted almonds I got from Trader Joe's, and those awesome garlic bagel chips.

So after the HAC lab, after French, after the leftovers, after the Lab, after the erging, after being told by my TA to completely redo my pchem lab calculations even though I'd rather get a 2/10 because I don't care, after showering and watching Sesame Street with Wesley, there was Kaplan. Which was surprisingly not as horrible as I thought it'd be. Hopefully I can still do well.

Then BOSTON LEGAL! I forget how much I like the show when I'm not watching it..

Time to find dinner. Perhaps a PB&J is in order, or maybe some white rice.. oh wait, its almost midnight, maybe I'll just go to sleep since I had so many of those dried cranberries... and strawberry milk!